Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Laughing At Life

Dear Bloggie,

  I was checking Meg Cabot's blog before going to sleep when I read about a site (and book) called Mortified. It's a site (and book) compiled of pictures or diary entries written by people when they were younger about things that were embarrassing then, or are now to look back at. Check it out, it's extremely funny. What's even funnier is the readings they have up on YouTube. I seriously laughed until it hurt.

   With that in mind, I decided to look through my own diary to see if I had anything I could summit. I found two things, a poem about a former crush, and a diary entry from 5th grade about a girl I hated with a burning passion.  Let me tell you, what hurt and was dramatic back them, now is as funny as hell. I wrote the poem in 5th grade about my crush, and at the time, the man I was sure I would marry. Because, you know, it was true love. The whole soul mate thing. :)

Without further ado, I present my masterpiece (exactly how I wrote it on the page)

Basketball + cute
Really cute and funny
Ever so cute
Nothing but cute
Nice and cute
Always cute
Never not cute


  Yes, I was a master poet even back then. I'm not sure what I had in mind with the "B". I mean, what does basketball have to do with anything? I don't even like sports! Now, onto the diary entry. The beginning is about a serious thing, but by the end, trust me, it's just...EHHH! Just read. :)

(Again, I'm coping everything off the page -- thoughts, misspellings, and all. Enjoy.)
                                             EVIL = Megan
                             4/15/07                            4/16/07
                           11:24 p.m.                         12:15a.m.

Dear Dee,
   On Saturday Zach B's dad dies. I found out on Monday 4/9/07. Sam, Brandon, Tia Cathy, my Mommy, and I whent to the wake. When we got there we saw EVIL. Sam and EVIL whent to hang out in a romm. EVIL hates me and I hate EVIL. Well, me and EVIL got into a fight and she called me names. I steped on her foot and I told her when we die I will de in the list that says that that pearson might go to heaven or might go to hell and she be in the begining of the list for hell and whe sh dies she will go to the front of the line.  Think she will become the Devels Queen there and he will tell Jack the Ripper (Side note: At the time I didn't really know who Jack the Ripper was. All I knew was  that he had killed people and wasal together considered a bad person bad.) that whan he did had the same amount of evil in one of EVIL'S finger. Sam told me that she thought I was unforgiving and that I had a stone cold heart. Me and Sam made up later at Stop and Shop. I really hate Megan = EVIL. You would  too. The six graders thin she is dumb. The fith graders thinks she is dumb! 
                                                                                         (My Name)
   Obviously I didn't like Megan (and that my spelling and grammar skills were atrocious). Though I guess stepping on her foot and saying she's the Devil's Queen (not to mention the thing about her having more evil in a finger, than Jack the Ripper possessed in his whole body) was a bit over dramatic....? Nah, if you knew Megan you would know I wasn't far from the mark.  

  She was always a bitch to me and truthfully, she treated my cousin Sam like crap. I never understood how Sam put up with it. Still, if I ever argued with her or stood up for Sam, Sam would always take her side. These scenarios were my inspiration for Missy in C.O.A.O.P. and how she is treated like crap by Sabrina (girl who is mean to Angela in the beginning of the novel, during the shopping scene) but still chooses her over Angela because she's desperate for her friendship, whatever the coast. 

   So now it's late and I have shared with you an embarrassing antidote, so I'm going to bed. I'm definitely post more entries when I get the chance. Goodnight. 


P.S. I just realized this is my 69th post. HAHAHAH! Sorry, my mind is dirty. It's weird, but I've come to see that kids who go to Catholic school have dirtier minds than public school kids. Isn't that ironic? :)


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