I have a Formspring, but I don't often check it. I don't really post things about it or anything like that, though it is listed on my Facebook under my websites. Yesterday, I got an email from Formspring saying I had five new questions. Because I don't really share my Formspring, normally my five questions are ones Formspring come up for me.
The first one was "What language would you like to learn how to speak?" Typical Formspring question. I was about to ignore the rest, but something told me not. That's when I read the next one. "do you think you're a good writer? or do you think ur a bad one? we all know the correct answer do you? we r just trying not to hurt ur feelings bitch!" Obviously, Formspring didn't send me this one.
I've been harassed by this mysterious person before. I know because I like to think of him or her as 'The person who can't fucking spell". Which just pisses me off to begin with. I'm not a fan of text talk. They get worse. "why are you so ugly?" "why are you so fat?" Then there were two questions that don't fit in with the rest. "who do you like?" and "Who is your bff?"
I would love to think it's some stupid bitch at my high school, but as I said, I haven't told anyone about it and I've had problems with this Forspringer before. Before I started high school. Before I even graduated 8th grade. That leaves only one alternative: it's someone who's being two-faced with me. I know a boy wouldn't go off like this (boys are different) and any guy I went to middle school with wouldn't really waste his time like this. That leaves the girls. Which hurts a lot more then the words, because I had this feeling of trust with them last year. Well, except with Serena because of our fights, but I know it's not her. On her Formspring there are similar messages there. Text spelling and rude. Whoever wrote on mine, did the same to hers.
I bet whoever the person behind this is the person who stole my cell phone last year. For those who weren't reading this blog yet, here's a link to my post about it. I had really felt hurt over that. I didn't only feel betrayed, but I also felt such an invasion of privacy. The person had taken it out of my backpack. Went through my phone. Went on my Facebook and sent texts with my name connected to them. It had really bothered me, especially since I never found out who the person was. Especially since I know the person had to be in my grade. Especially since I know the person was somebody I talk to and was around in a regular bases. All that time, they really didn't like me and was totally being two-faced.
You can see why I link one person (the Formspring person) to another (the phone stealing person). I just wish this person would grow up and get a life. Yeah, their words may bother me, I'm not going to pretend they don't. But I also can only imagine how boring, pathetic, and unsatisfying their life must be for them to do this. One day, I'm going to be somebody, and their still going to be a cyber bully, hiding behind a screen because they're too scared to say it to my face.
I'm not that biggest Taylor Swift fan (mainly for feminist reasons and because I don't really think she can sing that well, at least not acoustic or live), but her lyrics are very relatable (she is really good at song writing, I'll give her that -- and she has a wonderful sense of fashion). When I was having a hard time last year, I listened a lot to her song "The Best Day" a lot because I could relate my problems to it. My mom was there for me a lot last year so the following lines meant a lot to me:
I'm thirteen now and don't know how my friends could be so mean
I come home crying and you hold me tight and grab the keys
And we drive and drive until we found a town far enough away
And we talk and window shop 'til I've forgotten all their names
I don't know who I'm gonna talk to now at school
But I know I'm laughing on the car ride home with you
Don't know how long it's gonna take to feel okay
But I know I had the best day with you today
This time around, it's her song "Mean" that I find myself relating to.
So thank you Taylor Swift, for writing music that we can all relate to. I don't know what I would do without your music.