Saturday, February 20, 2010

I'm Sorry

Dear Non-existent readers
I probably shouldn't be writing this after the currant events in my life, but I need to talk it out. You see I consider you a diary, something that no one ever seems to read and if anyone did read this, I thought they wouldn't know me so I wouldn't care. But now I see I'm wrong. What should I do when I'm scared. I don't know how to apologize with out getting defensive, it's in my nature. I've always been defensive. But now I can't be because my wallowing (though almost two months ago) has cost me problems.

You know my old post "Friends", well that friend read it. Not the new girl (I wish it was her and not the other), the one I was upset at. That was never suppose to happen! I consider you a diary where I write thoughts that only people who don't know me or will ever know me can read, because they can't effect me and don't care about me. I guess your my version of "Yahoo Answers" without any answers. But now someone read it who does know me, someone I do care about. What should I do? What should I say? No matter what that person thinks, I do care about them and consider them a best friend as I always did. To be truthful even though my two friends from second grade and under weren't that nice, I will always consider them my best friends of a sort. Not my currant best friends, or my ex best friends, but my kindergarten through second grade best friends.

But now everything is messed up and I don't know what to do. I got advice from one of my other friends (not any of the two mentioned here) and I think I will follow it. I just hope she will listen (the one who is mad at me, not the new girl or the one who gave me advice) because I really screwed up. I though creating a blog would help me with my problems, well it just made it worst. Now that is a fact.



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